It’s the interview we’ve all been waiting for: The exclusive Oprah with Meghan and Harry and it didn’t disappoint as no topic was off the table: From the truth about her relationship with Kate and the Queen, to the state of her mental health and even the sex of their unborn baby, the interview is one of the most jaw-dropping TV spectacles of modern times. The couple shared bombshell after bombshell of their experiences within the royal family and revealed why they believe racism toward Meghan is truly at the core of many of their problems. Here we share the moments the world will be talking about for weeks to come and that have the potential to change the way the monarchy is viewed forever more.
1. Kate made Meghan cry not, as reported, the other way around.
From the outset, both Meghan and Harry wanted to be clear that this was a chance to set the record straight about erroneous press reports. Starting with a widely reported story that Meghan left her future sister-in-law, the Duchess of Cambridge, in tears over a bridesmaid dress fitting with Princess Charlotte. Meghan tells Oprah that it was in fact Kate who made Meghan cry and that she apologised for it.
“She brought me flowers and a note, apologising,” Meghan reveals. “And she did what I would do if I knew that I hurt someone, right, to just take accountability for it.’ Meghan added that it was “shocking” that the “reverse of that would be out in the world”.
She continued: “A few days before the wedding, she was upset about something pertaining – yes, the issue was correct – about flower girl dresses, and it made me cry, and it really hurt my feelings. “And I thought, in the context of everything else that was going on in those days leading to the wedding, that it didn’t make sense to not be just doing whatever- what everyone else was doing, which was trying to be supportive, knowing what was going on with my dad and whatnot.”
Meghan also said: “It wasn’t a confrontation, and I actually think it’s… I don’t think it’s fair to her to get into the details of that, because she apologised.
“What was hard to get over was being blamed for something that not only I didn’t do but that happened to me. And the people who were part of our wedding were going to our comms team and saying: “I know this didn’t happen. I don’t have to tell them what actually happened”.
2. Meghan was lonely and did not feel protected – she left the Palace twice in four months and was even told not to meet friends for lunch.
“There’s very little that I was allowed to do,” said Meghan. Sometimes she was even told not to go out with her friends for lunch. She says a member of the family came to visit her and told her, “You’re saturated…You’re everywhere right now, why not lie low for a while? Meghan replied: “It’s nothing like what it looks like. I’ve been everywhere but I’ve been nowhere. I’ve only been out of the house twice in four months. I felt lonely.”
3. They got married privately three days before the Royal Wedding
Meghan revealed the Archbishop of Canterbury married the couple three days earlier in a backyard ceremony with no guests present.
Revealing that she and Harry exchanged personal vows that they now have framed in their home in California, she said: “You know, three days before our wedding, we got married. No one knows that.
“We called the Archbishop and we just said, ‘Look, this thing, this spectacle is for the world but we want our union between us;” she said, adding of the May 19th official wedding at Windsor Castle, “It wasn’t our day.”
4. She was shocked to be told her unborn baby would not be given a royal title – and therefore wouldn’t be eligible for security.
“When I was pregnant, we now know it was Archie – they said they didn’t want him/her to be a prince/princess and they didn’t want him to receive security, this went on for the last few months of the pregnancy because he’s not going to be a prince.” Meghan claims there was no explanation why he wasn’t going to be a Prince she said she heard it mainly through Harry and family members. But she said it was about “the idea of our son not being safe, and also the idea of the first member of colour in this family not being titled in the same way that other grandchildren would be.”
5. There were concerns over the skin tone of her unborn baby
Meghan dropped the bombshell that put race front and centre of the conversation and confirmed that there was indeed an element of racism towards Meghan within the Royal family:
“In those months when I was pregnant, all around this same time, we have in tandem, the conversation of “He won’t be given security, he’s not going to be given a title,” and also concerns and conversations about how dark his skin might be when he’s born”, Meghan revealed to a shocked Oprah.
Oprah – clearly astonished – then interrupted and said: “Hold on. Hold up. Stop right now. There’s a conversation… about how dark your baby is going to be?”
Meghan replied: “Potentially, and what that would mean or look like”.
Without revealing who the conversation had taken place with, Meghan said: “I think that would be very damaging to them. That was relayed to me from Harry. Those were conversations that family had with him”.
Oprah then asked Prince Harry about the conversation, but Harry replied that it was something he was “never going to share” adding, “I was a bit shocked.” Harry also said that he felt that one of the “saddest” parts of the past few years was that no family member called out the “colonial undertones” of some of the media coverage around Meghan. He added: “And that, that hurts.”
6. Meghan had suicidal thoughts.
Perhaps the most shocking revelation from the interview was surrounding Meghan’s mental health and how at times she felt like she no longer wanted to live.
“It was almost unsurvivable,” she revealed. “My mum said, they’re not protecting you. I was ashamed to have to admit it to Harry because of how much loss he’s suffered but I just didn’t want to be alive anymore.
Describing how she considered ending her life believing it ‘was better for everyone’, Meghan said: “I knew that if I didn’t say it, that I would do it. I just didn’t want to be alive anymore. And that was a very clear and real and frightening constant thought. I remember how he just cradled me. I said that I needed to go somewhere to get help. I said that “I’ve never felt this way before, and I need to go somewhere”. And I was told that I couldn’t, that it wouldn’t be good for the institution”.
She revealed how she repeatedly asked for help from senior members of the institution but was denied access to go to any kind of hospital. So, Meghan revealed she turned to one of Princess Diana’s best friends for help. “Who else could understand what it’s actually like on the inside”, she revealed. She then spoke of how, just after revealing her suicidal thoughts to her husband when she was five months pregnant, the pair had to attend a function at the Royal Albert Hall, because she felt she couldn’t be alone and she says photos from the night still ‘haunt’ her as she said you can see how tightly Harry is gripping her hand.
“Every time the lights went down in the royal box I was weeping,” she said. “As soon as the lights went on you have to just be on again. You have no idea what’s going on with people behind closed doors.”
7. They’re having a baby girl!
When Oprah asked whether they’d reveal the sex of the new baby, which is due in the summer, Meghan – who wrote about tragically miscarrying her second child last year – turned to Harry and asked him to share the news. “It’s a girl!” he said. “To have any child would have been amazing. But to have a boy and then a girl – what more can you ask for? We’ve got our family – and our two dogs. Two is it.”
7. Harry and Meghan insist they did not blindside the Queen with their decision to move to Canada at the beginning of last year and Harry reveals his relationship with his father and brother.
“I’ve never blindsided my grandmother” insisted Harry, “ I have too much respect for her, adding “I’ve spoken more to my grandmother in the last year than I have done for many, many years,” he said. “My grandmother and I have a really good relationship. And an understanding.”
He says he spoke to the Queen about wanting to leave for two years beforehand and again two days before the statement came out. He also discussed it with Prince Charles. I “I had three conversations with my father before he stopped taking my calls and he asked me to put it in writing,” says Harry. When Oprah asks why Charles stopped taking his calls Harry said: “Because I’d taken matters in my own hands because I had to do something for my own mental health for my wife’s.” He goes on to reveal that he’s now back on speaking terms with his father. “[My father] is taking my calls now – there’s a lot to work through there, because he’s been through something similar – he knows how pain feels and Archie’s his grandson. I will always love him. I will continue to make it one of my priorities to heal that relationship. On William – whom he calls “trapped”, Harry says: “I love William to bits, we’ve been through hell together, but we’re on different paths.” Of his relationship with his brother now he says: “The relationship is space at the moment and time heals all things hopefully.”
9. They’ve got their Happy Ever After
After nearly two hours of hearing of their difficulties, Oprah ends the extraordinary interview by asking Harry what now delights him in his new life in California and what he cherishes. “This year has been crazy for everybody,” he responds “but to have outdoor space where I can go for walks with Archie and we can go for walks with the dogs, go for hikes or go to the beach…I guess the highlight for me is sticking him on the back of a bicycle in his little baby seat and taking him on these bike rides, which is something that I was never able to do when I was young.”
Meghan adds, “now because we’re actually on the other side, we’ve actually not just survived, but are thriving, this, miracles. I think that all of those things I was hoping for have happened and this is in some ways just the beginning for us. We’ve been through a lot, it’s felt like a lifetime…
To which Oprah then asks, “So your story with the Prince, it does have a happy ending?”
Meghan responds, “It does, it does.